The 6 Stories You Need to Know How to Tell
In her book, The Story Factor: Inspiration, Influence and Persuasion Through the Art of Storytelling, Annette Simmons discusses the six stories you need to know how to tell: (1) "Who I Am" stories; (2) "Why I am Here" stories; (3) "The Vision" story; (4) "Teaching" stories; (5) "Values in Action" stories; and (6) "I Know What You're Thinking" stories.
(1) "Who I Am" Stories: According to Simmons, people ask themselves "who is this person" when they realize that the speaker is trying to influence them. People don't necessarily want more information; they want faith. Facts do not create faith. A meaningful story that inspires belief in you creates faith. And the storyteller must have faith in the listeners. If a meaningful story is told in a manner that allows the listeners to come to their own conclusions (and the storyteller's desired conclusions), then the listeners will value the conclusions more highly and be more committed to their own conclusions than your airtight factual, logical conclusions presented to them on a platter. Story can reveal "who you are", and personal stories are the best "who I am" stories to tell. But fables, parables, historical stories, and current events stories can also reveal who you are if told on a personal level. Revealing a personal flaw can be effective in creating rapport and trust. Psychologists call it self disclosure. One rationale is that if I trust you enough to show you my flaws, then you can trust me enough to show me yours. Another rationale is reciprocation. Gerry Spence calls it "I'll show you mine if you show me yours."
(2) "Why I Am Here" Stories: Simmons uses a marvelous phrase, "rat reasons," in her book to describe why some people will not accept otherwise persuasive arguments. People won't cooperate with you if they smell a rat, so they sniff for rats and hidden agendas. If they don't trust you, they invent "rat reasons" not to accept your argument. [From another author's book on the evolutionary biology of the human brain: our present day suspicions are not just the product of our paranoia, but the evolutionary byproduct of being constantly on guard against threats. Our guard response has been replaced with an oversensitive "bullshit detector." Instead of constantly guarding against physical danger, we are now guarding against being taken by bullshit artists.] So, you must tell your listeners "why you are here." A genuine "why I am here" story reveals enough for people to judge whether you are pursuing an honest ambition or a dishonest exploitation. And, people don't mind self interested goals as long as the goal seeker is being straight with them and not trying to put something over on them.
(3) "The Vision" Story: If your listeners are comfortable with who you are and why you are here, then they are ready to hear your vision. A vision must be more than mercenary; it must be meaningful. A vision is more than "what's in it for me" (storyteller); it must include "what's in it for you" (listener). Further, a vision is bigger than both you and me. Simmons tells this vision story: A man came upon a construction site where three people were working. He asked each worker what they were doing. The first said, "Laying bricks." The second said, "Making a wall." The third put down his tools, stood up, smiled, and moved his arms in a sweeping gesture as he said, "I'm building a cathedral!"
(4) Teaching Stories: You can always tell people how to do things or give them rules to follow, but stories are much more effective. "Tell me and I'll forget, show me and I'll remember, involve me and I'll understand." Story is more than just telling. Story is more than "show and tell." Story is "tell, show, and involve." The meaning of the story must move something within the heart of the listener. Parables are a particularly effective form of teaching story, and Jesus was a master teller of parables. When presented with the "gotcha" question about working on the Sabbath, Jesus told the parable of the ox in the ditch. A "straight answer" may make logical sense, but it usually cannot reveal truth, advance justice, or change something within a person as stories are often able to do. What is more effective - stating that we should practice unconditional love, or telling the parable of The Prodigal Son?
(5) "Values in Action" Stories: The best way to instill a value is "by example." The second best way is to tell a story that provides an example. The story of Abraham and his son is a great illustration of a "values in action" story. If the speaker says, "I value faith," that means very little to the audience. However, if the speaker tells a personal story of great hardship and sacrifice in service of a value, then the audience will appreciate the speaker's value. Telling the audience that Abraham was a man of great faith is almost meaningless, but telling the story of Abraham's near sacrifice of his son to demonstrate his faith in God drives home the point. In fact, stating that you have a certain value without any demonstration of it may cause the listener to doubt the authenticity of your stated value and, consequently, to doubt your veracity. Stories bring values to life.
(6) "I Know What You're Thinking" Stories: Simmons tells a story about one of her consulting jobs. She was hired to conduct training in story and dialogue for management. The Silicon Valley CEO introduced her as the "young lady from North Carolina" who was going to teach them some "cheap psychological tricks" for management. Simmons decided to adopt the CEO's terminology and move around the resistance rather than fight it. Simmons explained her "cheap psychological tricks" and the psychological bases behind the "tricks" and she was able to overcome the CEO's sabotage effort as well as the managers' doubts engendered by the CEO's sarcasm. This is called disarming objections. If you identify the listeners' objections, then the objections are disarmed and then you can address them. Listeners enjoy having their minds read by the storyteller. Simmons tells another story of a speaker who began his speech with "I am a statistician and this will be the most boring one hour of your life." The speaker read the listeners' minds and zeroed in on their fear, "This is a statistician. This is going to be boring", and then he proceeded to tell hilarious stories. Telling "I know what you're thinking" stories can neutralize objections and fears without direct confrontation.
